One of the most difficult things I have experienced at college so far is holding on to the convictions the Lord has placed upon my heart. There are so many convictions that I feel, without the shadow of a doubt, the Lord has placed upon my heart for a purpose, but unfortunately there are times when it simply gets hard to live by those God-given convictions - yes, even at a Christian University.
During a time when I was feeling especially discouraged, the Lord spoke to me through the following message. It's long, but so good. It encouraged me so much and I know it was written right for me at that time.
O beloved, I see you in that place of solitude.
I see you in that place where no man knows or discerns the call and destiny or purpose for your life. And I would say to you this day that even in this place, is it not I who have hidden you in the cleft of the rock? Is it not by My sovereign hand that I have, for a brief moment, chosen to hide My plan and purpose from those who presently surround you?
...It is in this place of no recognition and no man's approval that surely your heart is tried and tested as to whom you will serve. So, precious child, this day I ask you, would you serve man and man's recognition and obtain man's reward, so fleeting, like a vapor?
...And it is as you humble yourself even amidst the pain of death to your flesh, even when no man knows your call, when no man sees your place or discerns My purpose for your life, that it is in the crucible of all that seems to count so much, that truly you are crucified with Me. That it may be no longer you that live, but My spirit within you... My bride shall say, "No longer Christ in me, but surely I have been crucified with Christ and my life is hid in Him."
...be not dismayed at what surrounds you... but rejoice that the King is at your right hand, and know that as you worship Me and Me alone, I shall bring your purpose forth in season... So be strong. Be of good courage, for I will never fail you or forsake you. For surely you have been tried in the furnace of affliction and have been found faithful, and so you have touched the heart of the Father.
It was just so amazing for me to remember that every word people say that discourages me and everything that happens that seems to tear me down is part of the way God purifies and refines me. The last line really stuck out to me... "... so you have touched the heart of the Father." When I lay down my Earthly desires and am willing to stand up for Jesus no matter the cost, even in the tiny, seemingly-insignificant things He calls me to do, it moves His heart - no matter how small the thing may be. God sees it and He is pleased, even if everyone else thinks it's pointless.
It seems so simple. In fact, it is so very simple. But why do I keep forgetting it?
(Quotation from Journal of the Unknown Prophet)
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